I know it is a bit presumptive to assume anyone will buy us anything for the baby, but I have to steer you away from our traditional registry and urge you to consider one of the items listed here:
http://www.cracked.com/article_16475_20-baby-products-great-traumatizing-infants.html.
(It's a guarantee that any one of these will be a hefty source of income for some lucky psychiatrist in the future.)
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I think I'll forgo the usual gift for the baby and get something off of that list for you and Dan instead. You guys take your pick - I've narrowed it down to five fun ones: #18, the swimming neck ring; #14, the Thudguard helmet; #12, The Daddle; #9, the manual snot sucker; and #5, the Man Boobs. In fact...JUST THINK OF THE AMAZING DATE NIGHTS AT HOME YOU AND DAN COULD HAVE IF YOU OWNED ALL FIVE. Start looking for a babysitter now.
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